THE END OF THE CIVIL WAR

Barack’s final rally before election day was in Manassas, VA. The site of the first major battle of the Civil War. A battle which the residents of DC traveled out to Bull Run to watch while picnicking. The beginning of the Civil War and the end of the Civil War, all in one location.

Of course, during the Battle of Bull Run the picnickers ran off in fear when the cannon balls started flying. This time, when Obama finished speaking, the voters triumphantly, enthusiastically… slowly, trudged home in bumper to bumper traffic.

Fun Fact: Manassas, VA, is the same town where Lorena Bobbit, in honor of the Civil War surgeons who came before her, amputated her husband's penis and threw it out the window. The same surgeon who reattached Mr. Bobbit’s penis, by the way, was unable to reattach the riding-lawn-mower-severed fingers of my grandfather some years earlier.

And now, Barack Obama, this man from Illinois, the land of Lincoln, the Civil War president who freed the slaves, is about to become the first black President. Martin Luther King Jr.’s dream will now be realized so close to where he said those words, on the opposite end of the mall from where he stood and gave the greatest speech ever given.

On the topic of iconic images. I’d like to point out how the 1988 movie “They Live”, starring Rowdy Roddy Piper, influenced Barack Obama’s election.

The artist who designed the wildly popular Barack Obama Hope poster is the same one who designed the Andre the Giant Obey stickers that you see everywhere, wonder what the fuck they are in the moment, and then promptly forget about.

An artist named Shepard Fairey took the word Obey from the film “They Live.” A film about aliens disguised as humans who take over the world through subliminal messages in our surroundings.

The Hope message was far from subliminal. They were quite in your face and you were very aware of them. But that is the market of today. We don’t want to be marketed to surreptitiously. We want to be aware of it.

So future Presidential candidates listen up – make sure you have a TRENDY poster. But don’t forget to have a sincere message to go with it.

Yes, the Civil War is over. Will the re-enactors please SURRENDER their iconic rebel flag?